Spooning

It's the simple things that really matter, right? Tonight I had brie for the first time in months. Why? Because brie has to be melted to be enjoyed properly, and I've had no stove or microwave.

It has actually gotten cold here. Not by Minnesota standards, but 39 degrees is cold according to most people. That's the foreecasted low tonight. Today wasn't bad. It was actually kind of nice. In the shade it was chilly, so you wanted to wear a sweater or go inside. Inside people were eating, and it was warm, so you got that cozy winter feel, but the thin skinned among us could still sit in the sun and be warm.

Tonight the wind is strong. I went to the store for bread and brie and was cold, and thankful that I have a sheltered place to stay. This is the sort of night that makes you want to spoon with someone and drink hot chocolate. It rained last night and I walked by a homeless guy. I know now what it feels like to know that the night is going to be long and uncomfortable, and even though my heart reached out to him, I didn't.

Why? Because I can't really help. If a friend called me last night and said he needed a place to sleep, I would have invited him over and pulled out the air matress. But I didn't know this guy, and he didn't ask me for help. In fact, he was eating some take out in the lee of the walgreens building. Pretty smart. Walgreens is open 24 hours. He won't have to leave unless someone calls the cops, and no one is going to do that on a cold rainy night.

I was homeless by choice. And while I know that others may not have chosen that life, I know that the experience brought me closer to my higher power. I came to better know who I am and why I am here because I let god take care of me for four months. I didn't ask any one to take care of me, and I was taken care of. Does this make me more of a republican? I hope not. People can have bad breaks and crappy luck. There should be resources in a civilized society to help those who are willing to work be able to feed themselves. And if one isn't willing to work, there should still be basic facilities for hygene and medicine so others don't have to suffer from one person's trauma.

But I am really digressing here. What I really wanted to talk about was spooning. When it gets cold out you want to have someone to come home to that will share warmth with you. And if you have a soulmate that you can't be with, you have to be happy just being warm. Sitting inside, listening to the wind blow outside, I am grateful.

We have a female cat in heat. She is driving the 4 month old male jack russel crazy. Honestly, her hormones are so strong, if I were a cat...

My friend went to sleep at 7:30. I am going to bed soon too. A comfortable bed, inside, with a nice wool, magic blanket to keep me warm through the cold winter night. And I will think about all the cold homeless people tonight. I will pray that they can find the lee side of a dry building and that they can open themselves up to some divine caretaking, some divine intervention, some divine inspiration, and that I be given the instinctual knowledge to do what I am supposed to for the good of all, according to the free will of all, and so must it be...

In the mean time, it's the little things that make the difference. Having some warm brie on a cold winter night. I hope it allows me to wake up rested and recharged, ready to walk to work and serve really good food at affordable prices to people who are willing to give a buck or two more for attentive service. And one day... a sailboat.

Clear skys, calm seas, and someone you love to spoon with on a cold winter night. :)