Still love south beach. Sitting at my old employer, news cafe, at the bar I was tending on september 11, 2001. Its my day off, and I took a risk and treated myself to a martini. Only one, they've caused me too much trouble in the past. Plus,I asked for kettle one, and I got something else, I'm pretty sure. Atleast it wasn't choked with vermouth. Anyway, there's a retired german couple to my left, a french woman of algerian descent to my right, and the bartender works two days a week here, and is five years away from retiring from a federal job at the airport. That makes him three years younger than me, but he looks ten years older. I don't know how I got so lucky, but I'm pushing 50 now and it is just sort of beginning to show, maybe I'm deluding myself. My grandmother says others say she doesn't look a day over 70. Maybe that's where I get the good genes.
Not that I'm worried, I am trying to make a daily light workout a habit. I don't push myself too hard, and I only care right now that I do it. I'm not trying to make myself attractive, those days are gone. I'm trying to lengthen my life a little. I'm getting old and I still don't have my boat. It is a secret fear that I will finally get it and then be diagnosed with cancer, or be too out of shape to take care of myself on a liveaboard.
Made it an early night and just finished some gnocchi with alfredo, portabello mushroom, and grilled chicken. My goodness, I forgot how good a cook I am...
My poor roommate has the flu. She finally gave up and took tomorrow off after staying in bed all day today. I've been nursing her to the best of my abilities, and within her tolerance. She should have had some gnocchi, instead she had marshmellow treats, and is now snoring. She needs more fluids, but atleast she is resting.
The french algerianchick had it all figured out. She's in her late 20's, maybe early 30's, and she definitely knew more than me or the bartender, both atleast a decade older. That's okay. When I was that age I also looked at 40-50 year old servers and figured they had nothing to teach me. That makes me a loser in my own 30 year old eyes, and just young in my almost 50 year old eyes. I'm ok with how I spent the last 15 years of my life. I didn't become a millionnaire, but I'm more enlightened, and in better shape than a lot of people my age. There I go comparing again. Waste of time.
Just finished watching cadilac records about the chess recording studio, muddy waters, little walter, chuck berry, and etta james. Can't figure out yet why I identify so much with them, but the movie always gives me hope when I watch it. It should depress me, but it doesn't. Makes me think about my soulmate. She's out there, thinking about me. And I'm here, thinking about her. That's why she's my soulmate. No matter what seperates us, we are still together and always will be. Love will see us through, at last.
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